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And so it begins..... Tik-tok, tik-tok, the clock tik's and tok's and we get up and go about our days. Tik Toking through life, not being just doing. We all have our to do lists, our should do lists, our have to lists, and our dream lists are put to the bottom of the pile. Dreams are for dreamers not for real people, not for adults. Dreams are for Alice in her wonderland, for Dorthy on her yellow brick road. Dreams are for children? Or are they? Everywhere I look people are depleted, lost in the world of doing, their dreams put to one side. I see people who are living in a zone of compliance, of what they should be, how they should be, what they should look like, who they should be friends with, who should be their lovers. So many being compliant and wearing the compliant masks of family, friends and societal expectations. But those masks of compliance get heavy and we get weary, our mind, our body and our spirits become depleted as we operate more and more away from our natural preferences and our comfort zone. We stay fixed is a zone of compliance or complacency. Allowing the world to happen to us, instead of shaping the world that is right for us. And we live in a world of crisis - war, political unrest, pandemic, and the big crisis make the small crisis in our life seem huge and we bounce back and forth from one crisis to another, never getting chance to recharge, to replenish and fall in love with life again. When I speak to coaching clients often they are so depleted, they feel lost, they feel alone and have nowhere to turn. They feel like they should be grateful for the roof over their head, the food on their plate, the good job, the family. But they are weary and although their outer mask looks happy, they are tired. I ask them what they love and they do not know. They have got lost in the world of what they should be, and with it they loose their anchor to what is important to them. Like many these people have grown up with the words "get out of your comfort zone" and have grown to assume the comfort zone is bad. I see many things on social media saying that nothing good happens in the comfort zone, that magic doesn't happen in the comfort zone, that the comfort zone is a bad place and in it you'll be tired. It's like we are now made guilty for feeling comfortable. And it needs to change. I ask people who say they need to get out of their comfort zone, where is their comfort zone and few can answer. And when I explain the clue is in the title "comfort" then suddenly the lightbulb comes on and many say " I don't know where my comfort zone is, so how can I get out of it?" and there lies the problem. We've grown up in a society that keeps pushing, that we forget that we have to be comfortable to grow. We'd never expect an oak tree to thrive in the dessert without water. It's not it's natural habitat, it's natural preferences. Yet from an early age we do this to our children and to ourselves throughout our lives. When you hear of entrepreneurs getting ideas it's generally not when they are somewhere uncomfortable it's - in the shower, the bath, on a walk, in bed, swimming, running. Often it's in a place where they can relax, replenish and be comfortable. We need to recognise that embracing our comfort zone is where we recharge our batteries. within it we have a cosy zone the ultimate place to rest and recuperate, and the comfort zone can expand and retract around this cosy zone depending on what is happening in our lives. The comfort zone borders the challenge zone, things on the edge of our comfort zone are more challenging, but still within our natural preferences. When we look at the stages of learning we start of not knowing that we need to know something, then we realise we need/want to learn something but its hard, and over time it gets easier and easier until it becomes second nature. Think about riding a bike, driving a car. We want to get to a point where it is so comfortable it's second nature and then we know we are good at it. You may then want to challenge yourself by doing mountain biking or cycling for long distances. It's still in your comfort zone but you are expanding the comfort zone with some challenges to help it grow. But now we live in a world where if you don't master something straightaway you are a failure. If things get too easy you need to push yourself to be "uncomfortable again". And with it we exhaust ourselves, we drain ourselves dry, we don't do things to nourish our mind body and spirit. But it's time for a change. Its time to embrace our natural preferences, its time to embrace our comfort zone, really understand our wants and needs and build up a cosy zone to go to in crisis and when ill so we can recharge fully. As this exhaustion epidemic creeps over us. As our workforce's, our children our care givers, and everyone around gets more and more depleted we need to embrace our comfort zones, to nourish and replenish our very essence. We need a rest revolution, where we are taught how to rest from an early age and understand that rest is as unique to us as our DNA, our fingerprints or the iris of our eyes. It's time to embrace our preference and love life again so we can fulfil our dreams. A world without dreams become devoid of magic and wonder, and the magic and wonder in the world that supports our dreams is what makes us the magical holistic human beings we are. Watch this space for more news on how to embrace your comfort zone. Sign up to my emails for daily inspiration to your inbox.

I remember feeling exhausted, every day, but like many, I thought I should continue I should keep going. I needed to "pull myself together", "just get on with it", and "stop whining". I am sure you have heard similar things from others, or from the voices in your own head. In December 2009 when my period came, I literally didn't want to move. I felt like I had the flu. My arms and legs ached. My whole body felt like lead, I had brain fog and it didn't matter how much I slept I still felt tired. At the time I was living a hybrid life. My work was based in Banbury, two and a half hours from where I lived. I'd been in this job since October 2018 and I'd made the leap because I thought it would be my dream job. It wasn't. I'd get up at 5:30 am on a Monday and drive to Banbury to avoid the rush hour traffic. I'd work all day and had negotiated to work some days at home. But Monday to Wednesday I was in the office. At the time I was living one night with a work colleague and friend who was off work ill, I'd help her clean, help do her shopping, and help cook for her. She was later diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome. On the second night, I was living with another work colleague and friend. She had two children at home and I'd sleep in the bottom bunk and her primary school-age daughter in the top bunk. This friend was recovering from cancer, but also going through many things with her older children and the children living with her, some unforeseen deaths in the family, and the general pressures of being a single mum. Some nights I'd be trying to get the kids to bed as she had a breakdown in her kitchen. She was the life and soul of every party and she rarely let out how she truly felt, which was exhaustion and overwhelm. Sadly this friend has since passed away, I miss her dearly. On Wednesday evenings I'd finish work at 5 pm but I'd wait until after 6 pm to leave as the traffic home to Shropshire was a nightmare. I'd get home about 8:30 pm to 9 pm tired and exhausted from travel, work and being in different beds where I never slept properly. Thursday morning I'd wake up and go to my family farm, milk the cows and do jobs around the farm, as my dad was ill and my mom has had chronic health issues since I was a child. I'd come home and work from home and at 4 pm go back and manage the farm again. I'd repeat this on Friday. Saturday and Sunday would be catching up on housework and the other jobs on the farm. and Monday back to work. I was lucky my Uncle came and helped and some neighbours, as well as my husband, but it was full on. During this time I'd also been approached for a job nearer to home, so I jumped at the chance to apply for it and when I got offered it, I handed in my notice thinking this would help solve all my problems. It didn't. I am one of those people who when I leave a job, work all the hours they can trying to leave it in a good place. My people pleaser in me wants to leave everything right. Even though I know for a fact many jobs I have left, I've actually been asked to go back in and show them something and I say "it's in the handover document" and find they deleted or threw away all my hard work. Lesson to us all, to not break a sweat in finishing things when we leave, it's not appreciated. So as you can imagine I was putting even more pressure on myself. In February 2010 I fell ill. I had felt nauseous, fatigued, aches and pains, dizzy, stomach issues, you name it everything, I literally couldn't move for the next 3 months. And my people pleaser was devastated as I felt like I was letting my old job down as I hadn't been able to do my handover, and I was panicking as I was due to start my new job. I was ill most of my notice period and I was sure people would think I was faking it. A few weeks before I was due to finish I felt a little better and was able to do some odd bits and bobs, but I was thoroughly exhausted and had no idea how I was going to start a new job, but I did. I started my new job in May 2010 and as you do, you are trying to make a good impression. At the same time, I was seeing my GP to find out what was wrong with me. They checked me for deficiencies, for various illnesses, but my GP said to me "I've been waiting for you to break for years, surprised you have lasted this long. I am sure you have chronic fatigue syndrome, but I'll check you for everything else first". In June 2010 I was on a team day and it was a hike up a local hill, I couldn't make it and returned to my car and my new manager and HR asked what was wrong. I explained and I was reduced to a 3-day week, seeing the company doctor and having Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) paid for by the company to help me. My chronic fatigue was confirmed by the GP and company doctor in July 2010. And my journey of living with fatigue began then. I worked part-time for the rest of 2010 and initially, my company was incredibly supportive. But in December 2010 accusations were made about me not returning the calls of some senior managers and it really knocked me back. my confidence was so low and my self-esteem it was easy to get "gaslighted" and not see it. In early 2011 I discovered the accusations were incorrect (I'd phoned the managers in question to apologise) and it was someone else they had made the complaint about, so they had no idea why I'd been put on a disciplinary for it. But it knocked my confidence and made my condition even worse. By now I was exhausted. I needed to work but I had no self-confidence, I constantly doubted myself and became paranoid that I was being scrutinised all the time. I'd jumped out of a job I hadn't enjoyed into one in a culture that I didn't fit with, but felt trapped. Who would employ a woman with fatigue? Even though I knew it wasn't good for me, I continued for another 7 years working in a high-level senior management role. Travelling across the UK and Europe. Hitting massive cost-saving targets. Helping in takeovers and acquisition projects. Expanding my team from 5 to 23 people. I got some excellent feedback, but with the slightest mistake or illness I felt like I was being targeted. Fatigue can really make you feel more paranoid, in some instances justified and others not. In 7 years I had 6 different managers, (3 of whom were made redundant). My life became work and I'd work late each evening trying to keep up with the workload. I'd sleep at weekends with no energy to do anything else. I had no social life but did force myself to the gym every Sunday afternoon. I used to envisage my workplace as a prison (not a good practice I can assure you), and to be fair with its high fences it does look like one. Much of what was being said and done clashed with my values and beliefs. It was a very extroverted place of work and I am an introvert. Everything about it was exhausting and then each month my periods would be so heavy and so painful, I felt like there was no escape. I would try and look for magic and wonder in the world. The donkeys in the field on my way to work, the rainbows. But I found it harder and harder to keep a grasp on the good things. My light was dimming and I was no longer being myself. One thing that kept me going was I was writing children's books. I was attending writing events and I loved them. Those and my holidays to Wales were my sanity. But I had other coping mechanisms too. Eating too much, drinking too much, spending too much. All little addictions to keep me going. In 2013 I used my company's private medical insurance to investigate my heavy periods. I'll write on this in more detail another time, but in 2014 it was confirmed I had endometriosis and adenomyosis. It was too advanced to treat so I had to find a way to live with it. In my case paracetamol, ibuprofen and codeine. And that rarely reduce the pain and didn't help with the fatigue which got worse at that time of the month. On one occasion I collapsed in a street in Germany on a business trip. I'd requested not to go as I knew my periods were on and I'd explained this to my manager. I'd suggested my team members went as it was a trade fair and I'd been many times so it was more beneficial to them. I was told I had to go. And I wasn't allowed to travel the night before due to costs, so it was an early flight. An early flight, bleeding heavily, being on my feet all day, and not eating properly resulted in me being overnight in a german hospital. I was then threatened with disciplinary for it when I returned. Yet I still stayed. Too scared to leave, thinking no one else would employ me. Blaming myself for everything. In 2016 I decided it was time for a change, I requested to step down from my role and take a new role that we'd just created where I could work 4 days a week. My request was denied. Two months later driving home from work I almost crashed my car 3 times. I hit a kerb, I misjudged a bend, and I didn't brake quickly enough. I got home and I was in tears and rowed with my husband before storming out of the house on a cold winter's evening only in a dress, cardigan, leggings and slippers. Even though it was bitterly cold, I went and stood by a pond in my village and wanted to go and lie at the bottom of it. Not to kill myself. I very much wanted to live. But just to stop and pause time, to rest and sleep. When I came home my husband told me to quit my job and I said I'd think about it overnight. The next day I was working from home and the emails started coming in. I looked at them and thought, no, I cannot do this anymore. I wrote my resignation letter and sent it to HR and my manager. I still got emails, for hours afterwards, so I sent an email saying I was taking the rest of the day off with stress and switched off my computer. That night 2nd December 2016 I was due to see The Shires in concert, it was the most amazing night. I felt like the world had been lifted off my shoulders and I ran along the promenade, spinning, laughing and I remember my husband saying "I've got my girl back". I knew Id made the right decision. Did all my fatigue disappear then? No of course not. But I worked my 6 months' notice, which was one hell of an emotional rollercoaster ride and became self-employed in June 2017. It took me until December 2018 to recover, regain confidence, and self-esteem, feel less tired and not be ill all the time. In January 2019 I started walking daily and building in self-care practices. As I did my periods became less painful, I had fewer aches and pains and my brain fog and other symptoms eased. I was just starting to feel I was ready to bloom again when my husband was taken very ill and I was caring for him and then we went into the COVID pandemic. I was lucky to have plenty of work on my packaging consultancy, but with my husband furloughed and so much uncertainty, my healthy practices stopped as I focused on trying to keep us financially secure. As we all know 2020, 2021 and early 2022 was strange time. We were living but not living and I could feel my old symptoms creeping back up on me. In April 2022 I went to my Osteopath after I had had a fall. Falls are always the universe's way of telling me to slow down. And he said as he treated "Haulwen you are thoroughly depleted" . A light bulb switched on, this was the word I was looking for. It's funny how after all this time, and having had burnout a few times in different forms in my life prior to this, I had never thought to use the word depleted to describe how I felt. But there it was. The word that really described how I was feeling in April 2022, but also from 2009 until 2019. The word depleted feels like it captures how I have felt much more than exhausted, tired or burnout. And that's what brought me back to where I am today. In 2017 when I first started coaching I had wanted to focus on fatigue but was persuaded not to, but I think that was a good thing, as now is the right time for me to bring together my years of knowledge and training to help you. So why have I waited since April to do this? Well, I have been going back through my life determining what are the things I have used time and again to get me through and allowed me to work and to live. And what advice would I give my former self now? I've looked through the books and articles I have saved and read and with it, I have devised my own method to help you to not make the same mistakes I have. Do I still feel depleted? Yes of course I do. This is why what I am devising is something that you will need to come back to time and again. 2023 is the year for me to put this together to help you. Why not sign up for my daily inspirational emails and news about upcoming events HERE

I haven't blogged for some time. I've been in a bit of a betwixt and between place since the Covid pandemic hit and really been trying to determine my true coaching niche. And I've been breathing into it, and slowly leaning into it since April last year when my Osteopath said to me a word that struck a cord. "Depleted" . That one word took me back to my original coaching plan in 2017 when I was going to set up a fatigue fight club, but I had self doubt and didn't listen to myself but to others. So I put it to one side. But there was always a nag that being a 'life coach" or doing "life coaching with a hint of witchery" wasn't quite right for me, even though I loved what I was doing. This time, instead of jumping straight in I took my time. I allowed myself to sit with this for a while. I started to draft my next book and with it I found my path. My experience and my training has all led to this point. I am an Energy Mindset Mentor. 13 years living with chronic fatigue syndrome (whilst still working), living with debilitating endometriosis and adenomyosis, I know what it is to feel depleted, tired, exhausted and overwhelmed and I am here to really help and guide people out of the fatigue fog into a world where they can thrive in their own way. I needed to spend some time sitting with this to see where my future would lie. And this feels so right, it feels like my calling to help people who are tired not just physically and mentally but spiritually too. I've developed my own method which I tested out in a retreat I ran in November 2022 and I was thrilled at the reaction I got from the ladies who attended. And I'll be using this method in further training which will be in the form of retreats, masterminds, 1:1 coaching and my membership. It always takes us time to find our true north and now I have found mine I am looking forward to sharing my thoughts, my ideas and my hints and tips with you. Thank you all for sitting with me as I went silent for a while. I will occasionally go silent if the need arises to restore and replenish my mind, body and spirit, but know I am always here to be the light to guide you towards your guiding star and away from feeling depleted. Let my new story and my new path commence. Be the first to know about new blogs by signing up to my daily inspirational emails HERE

Imbolc, Chinese New Year and a New moon all on the same day and going into 02.02.2022 Image: Alberttch Getty Images via Canva Pro Welcome to February. This is a time of starting to feel the light returning and a spring in our steps, but with a little warning we know we have some time to go and there are more months of winter to come (if you are in the Northern hemisphere). (Groundhog Day in Punxsutawney is held on 2nd February each year and their Groundhog meteorologist predicts how many weeks of winter are left - check out their website for their Groundhog countdown - https://www.groundhog.org) Because of this the 1st - 2nd February 2022 is a very auspicious time and a great time to really set those intentions. Most people have already given up on their January resolutions by now, but the energy is rising, the sap is rising, we can feel the roots beneath us stirring to start a new cycle. And this is what Imbolc (or Candlemas as it is also known) celebrates. It marks the time of new beginnings and is celebrated from the evening of 1st February to the evening of 2nd February 2022). Light a candle* to the goddess Brigid or to the christian St Bridget to welcome in the new life to the world. This year we also have the Aquarius new moon falling on this day - a time for clarity and inspiration. It's a time to become clear on what actually needs your attention. (As you can tell there's lots of intentional energy going on here). But it doesn't stop there. This New Moon is the new moon to start the Chinese New Year and this year its the year of the Tiger. For me it feels very special as I am a Tiger in my Chinese years, I even have a tiger tattoo to represent it. But the Tiger is a symbol to be brave, so go for it and follow your dreams. And on top of all of this, like these days cannot be any more auspicious, we have 02.02.2022!! All the two's and in numerology the number two is influence by the moon, and its considered a number of partnerships, relationships and co-operation. Its a very feminine force and seen as a symbol of hope and positivity. So if there is a time to set intentions do consider taking one small step towards your dreams on this day. it could be planning some time for self-care. Signing up for that course you want to do, or just committing to read that book. It's the little things that take us towards our dreams. Witchy wishes Haulwen x * (candles should never be left unattended and used safely)

The festive break has allowed you time to switch off and relax. Coming up to it you were probably running full pelt to hit pre-festivities deadlines in work and your personal life. The big festival day comes and if you are one of the lucky ones you aren’t returning to work until January. And that is when it hits. The realisation that there is so much to do, in work and at home. The feeling of overwhelm can seem like you are drowning and you can’t find anything to grab hold of. You become paralysed and it just gets worse. You want a fairy godmother to stop time and you fantasise about what that would look like and how you could finally catch up. This is me, and was how I felt every new year, and a bit of me still does, but I’ve now taught myself how to pull myself out of the water of my own demands to focus on what’s truly important. When you look up overwhelm on the internet, often there are lots of hints and tips, but just reading the topic or looking to do the tasks to reduce overwhelm make you feel overwhelmed. This year my overwhelm has been about all the ideas I have, but some years it’s the to-do-list, or the should-do-list, or the what I didn’t-do-list. We all react to overwhelm in different ways, and we all need to tackle overwhelm in a way that suits us. Each of us will have different triggers and with it different solutions and we need to find the one that works for us to solve this. Here are some things to consider to reduce overwhelm for you; What are your symptoms of overwhelm? - anxiety, depression, tiredness, can all be symptoms but they will be unique to you, but so can addictions - alcohol, drugs, food, spending, etc. When do you feel overwhelmed? - typical environments , triggers (past trauma can impact this too), people, tasks. Where do you feel overwhelmed? - in work, school, at home, with certain people. Who do you become when you feel overwhelmed ? Can you identify a trend in your family about learned behaviour. Who do you think you are letting down? Why do you feel overwhelmed? What areas of your life? Or all areas? How does overwhelm impact your life? How have you overcome it in the past? To help overcome overwhelm you have to first understand it, then you can use strategies to manage it, strategies you can come back to over and over again. Remember that we have to learn new behaviours and these take time. When you first wrote, read, rode a bike, walked - you had no idea but with practice you were able to learn to use these skills and they became second nature. The same applies for dealing with how you respond to feeling overwhelmed. You have to let go of your past - of your fear, hurt, anger and guilt and find the solutions that work for you. But remember that what works for one person won’t work for another. I find doing mind maps of every aspect that overwhelms me, really helps. I create a visual colourful image and it feels write for me to see my life in this way. Others take the areas of their life and write lists to break down into bite size chunks (personally this overwhelms me more, even though a mind map is doing a similar thing) If you are a big picture person going into that level of detail can be stressful so stepping back and seeing the bigger goal can help. Whereas for those who are more detail orientated they need to zoom into the detail to feel less overwhelmed. Understanding your personality type can help you understand typical reactions for your type and give you practical solutions. Understanding what energises you and what drains you can help you determine which tasks to focus on first. Understanding how you view time can help you understand if you are thinking everything needs to be done now or if you can visualise it in the future. Start with understanding your overwhelm and then you can create your own path out of the overwhelm forest. Know that you are not alone and you will get through this. Moonbeams and starlight Haulwen The Magical Mojo Coach Intuitive life coaching with a hint of witchery If you found this useful, let me know, I am looking to develop a short course on this to help people with overwhelm. Image: mspont - free from Canva Pro

Do you believe in ghosts? It's Halloween season and I thought I'd share some ghost stories with you. 24th October 2002 was the day my brother, aged 30 , died. He had an operation 2 weeks previously and died of a pulmonary embolism caused by a DVT in his leg. My mom heard a thud and went upstairs and found him unconscious, and a nurse who was a neighbour rushed over to give CPR. He was pronounced dead in the local hospital. Thats the facts (a lot more to it than this but lets get into the story). I remember that evening well. As I was travelling home from work I had my usual urge to go visit my mom and dad. As I came to the roundabout where I made the decision to turn left to my parents home or straight-on to my home, I paused. I was tired and I often had an instinct to go to my parents, my mom has chronic health issues and each time I went sure enough she was ill, but I was exhausted and I had decided I needed to sometimes not listen to me intuition to go home and put me first. To this day, I am glad I didn't go with my intuition. Me being there couldn't have saved my brothers life, and I would have had to witness the CPR and I am forever grateful for putting myself first. When I got to my home I was tired, I wanted to rest, but I was restless and then I got the call. I was expecting it to be my mom being rushed into hospital again, and was surprised that it was my brother. At this point in my life I was living about 45 minutes away from my parents, about a 30 minute drive from my home to their local A&E, I still remember driving at speed with my husband calmly saying, "we need to get there in one piece too" - it felt odd going there because of my brother not my mom, though only the week before he'd been rushed in to hospital, with breathing difficulties and collapse. His conversation from the week before was going through my mind. He'd told me he was scared he was going to die and that he'd done a tarot reading and got The Tower, Death and The Hanger Man. He had looked like a scared little boy, which was rare these days as often his energy was in some dark unsavoury place and I mainly avoided spending much time with him. I had assured him, that the cards don't literally mean death, but in my mind it did feel like he had a major change coming in his life. As I drove towards the hospital the moon was full, with a circle around it, and there was also red blotches across the moon. I still remember looking up at it and saying to my husband "blood on the moon". Anyone who has watched Practical Magic will know the meaning of this, but it can be considered a portent of something bad about to happen. As I looked at the moon I was driving towards I suddenly took my foot of the accelerate, pulled into the slow lane and said "he's dead, no point rushing now". We got to into the A&E unit about 10 minutes later and my Mom and dad said "he's gone! only about 10 minutes ago, but he's gone“ . The coming weeks were a whirl as you can imagine and eventually he was buried, but it was a few weeks after this that the mischief began. First it was my mom, she said she was seeing my brother and kept waking in the night to the sound of stones being thrown at the bedroom window, when she'd get up to look out the window he'd be staring at her with his big grin, just like he did when he had lost his keys in the past And then he’d just disappear. At first dad and I put it down to grief, until dad took me to one side and said he'd got up in the night to look, he'd heard the stones too but had ignored them, but he had seen him too. However he had something else he wanted to discuss with me. Each morning when dad got up my brothers bedroom door was open and the smell of my brothers deodorant was wafting through it. Each day dad would close the door and would ensure it was closed before he went to bed. My dad is quite logical in many ways, so he removed all the deodorant cans in case the scent was leaking out. My brothers, bed linen and clothing had either been thrown away or washed and put away. Yet each morning the same thing would happen. I still remember dad taking me to one side and saying to me " I don't understand what you do, but can you do something?" - now the way I work with my witchy ways is I look inside to feel if it is the right thing to do. And instinctively I knew exactly what was needed. My brother often did tarot and I was taught by a tarot reader to always do some protection work before using the cards, and to keep your cards with some crystals, herbs to keep them clear of malignant energies. This was from a tarot card reader who told me that her cards said they belonged to me and she had gone quite pale as she'd never had such am message before. (that's a story for another time). I know my brother dabbled in the use of his cards. I tend to use my oracle and other cards for everyday use and my tarot when I'm more focused. But with all I ensure my mind is clear before I ask my question. I knew my brother didn't and with this and the dark energy that surrounded him (I'll talk about these dark energies in a different story) I was sure that we need to find a way to clear the energies so he could be released, to where I do not know, but be released. I did also use this as a bit of a scientific experiment. I may be a witch but I am a scientist too. I told dad I would look at what I could do, but I said I wouldn't tell him when I had done it. I left it a little while as I needed the house to be empty and to know I wouldn't be disturbed. My first step was to find his tarot cards, some say cards should be buried with their reader, others say they must be passed on only with permission and if the cards are receptive. for me I knew the reader and cards had been separated abruptly and that they needed to be destroyed. I burnt the cards and ensured they were completely destroyed before starting a cleansing ritual. I opened all the windows and doors to allow the energy to flow, but also I didn’t want my parents to smell the smoke, and I took a bunch of dried sage (a sage smudge stick) and smudged my brothers room. Saying these words: Lord and Lady of the light bless this house with all your might take away the fear and pain let this place be happy again I then went through the house flicking salt water across the thresholds and into all the corners, just a few drops, not enough to be noticed reciting the same words until I had done every room. I closed the windows and doors and left the house as I had done before I entered . I didn’t expect to hear anything from my parents but my dad phoned me a few hours later, ‘have you been here? ‘ he asked ‘What makes you think I have been to yours?’ I replied. ‘Nothing, but he’s gone, I don’t know what you did and I don’t want to know, but he’s gone’ I don’t believe he told my mom, but when I next saw her she said my brother had stopped visiting and dad confirmed there had been no problems with the smell of deodorant or the door being open. After that everything felt back to normal, but I also started to notice as time went on that the dark energy that in associated with my brother, which I would often feel and see around my moon, was going to, it very rare I see that darkness around her now. Haulwen The Magical Mojo Wytch join my free Facebook group The Mojo Coaching Club sign up for free daily inspiration to you inbox or join my paid membership The Magical Mojo Academy - life coaching with a hint of witchery

Empathy - the power to connect with others, to understand what they are going through. I've been thinking about it a lot these last few weeks as I see the reaction to the take over of Afghanistan by the Taliban. As a white western woman living in my cosy house in the United Kingdom it can be hard to relate and put myself in their shoes, to understand what they are going through. And the worlds media has made those of us in the West numb to images of war zones, starving children, destitute refugees that's its become like a film that we can watch and walk away from. Think of your favourite TV programs and films the ones you watch over and over again, they are the ones where you have a connection to a character (s) and empathy for what they are going through even in a fantasy or science fiction world. We get to know traits about them that makes us connect, the books they read, the jokes they tell, their love of animals etc. We do the same in real life. I am a scientist, a writer, a coach and a witch. Today myself and an engineer made a connection on zoom because I have a vintage microscope on the shelf behind me. It broke down barrier, he told me of his love of collecting aeronautical books and instruments. Not something I am interested in, but I collect and I have a science interest, so we connected. Our conversation flowed and he has offered ways to help me on my project. We connected and we have empathy for each others similar working situations. So now lets go back to the refugees we see on the news. The media and our governments never interview these people on the ground. They show them as "different" as "other". They wear different clothes, speak a different language, have different colour skin, different beliefs, and from that we make assumptions. The media like to show us only pictures of men, not of families. So we make more assumptions. We assume that as we see pictures of people in dirt and dust trying to escape persecution that they are dirty, they are unkempt. (we would be too if we were escaping). We assume they are not standing up for their own country. (they are but the media aren't telling us this, but how far would you go to risk your family ? ) We assume they are not deserving because our media and governments have marked them as "other". And that is what they want. "Other" - as humans we are scared of "other", and as I see some of the callous comments on social media from people sat in their cosy homes with no fear of someone coming and knocking on their door to kill, rape or maim them, saying "no to other", "other is bad". But sometimes someone will show us that other has something in common with us and then we relate. I've seen this happen about animals, two animal rescue centres in Kabul have been posting on social media. One led by a British ex marine Pen Farthing the charity NOWZAD and one led by an American woman Charlotte the not for profit Kabul Small Animal Rescue. Would we have listened if Afghans were posting, I doubt it. Because we had already removed one barrier of "other" because they look and sound like us, so we listened. Then we saw pictures and images of dogs and cats being rescued from the streets, but also pets left behind by Americans and British, and others who are leaving. These were people of Afghanistan, "others" doing what many of us, who are animal lovers would do. They were rescuing animals. We saw images of these rescues of puppies and kittens, of cats and dogs, we saw them feeding them, playing with them and protecting them. And with it those people in Afghanistan stopped being other. We can relate to them and now we want to hear the stories of young men and women training to be vets and veterinary nurses, we want to learn about their families and how they will try everything they can to save these animals. We have empathy, we can relate. They are no longer other, because we can see how they have similar value and beliefs systems to us and now we want to help them because of it. But the response of some, including some in power is to try and stop us in the West helping the "others" in Afghanistan. Ego's and politics trying to distract us from the true issues. The media and these politicians, from all sides, (I'll call them ego's going forward) focusing on a couple of privately funded flights to safety, because they have animals on board , so these "ego's" can focus on this as a diversion, to say. "Look we care for these people and are putting people before animals" Basically saying "look at me, look at my ego, look I am better than you, look at humans not animals, but most of all keep looking at these human beings as "other" " because what they fear most is we have empathy for these people. These people with names. And when people have empathy for others they have power. They have power to make change and they have the power to make a difference. And once we accept one "other" we will accept "other others too". We can't have that. Because once we stop seeming them as "other" and start caring we start asking questions. We ask the questions about "why were flights stopped?" "why did we withdrawal without giving support" we start to look for facts, we ask "why are flights leaving which are empty, but you are denying extra flights to leave with extra people?" we ask "why can privately funded flights get people out but government funded ones are leaving half empty or rescuing cars". And then we start questioning other things they are doing? And they don't want that. So next time you find yourself looking at something as "other" - stop and consider who is giving you that message and is it truly yours. Talk to someone or find out about the real people, the real stories behind the news. Stop fuelling "other". We've all done it. I have done it and I know I'll have to stop myself forming the "other" vision in the future. But we need to be aware, we need to make the first steps and we need to ensure we are working to our own values and beliefs, not the ones that the outside world can make us think we should believe. So be kind. You won't always have empathy with "other". Some "other" will go against your core values and beliefs and if that's so, do you need that "other" in your life. Don't try and change them, change yourself, but most of all don't hate them. We can all live in a world with different opinions and different values and beliefs. We can have ideas and ideals that are completely different. But it doesn't mean we have to hate those people. Just take time to understand "other" and learn to live with "other" if they are not someone you can empathise with. If their "other" doesn't impact you and your sphere of influence then, why waste your energy. Focus on you. Let them be them. But don't let it fuel hate, but where you can relate to other who you can help, help them, because one day you may be grateful that "other" helped you. Sending love to all those who are suffering across the world - you may be "other" but we can hear, we can listen and we can try to empathise. And where we can't we will be kind. Haulwen Haulwen Nicholas The Magical Mojo Coach Inspiring women to live a life of magic and wonder to follow their dreams. Founder of the Magical Mojo Academy - Life Coaching with a hint of witchery. Join my free Facebook Group Sign up for daily inspiration

We all have dreams, aspirations, goals we'd like to achieve, yet often these slip to the bottom of the pile. The "should do's" the "pay the bills" the "others needs" often come first. The problem with this is that you will dim your light. Taking small steps towards our dreams is just as an important piece of self-care as going for a walk or eating something healthy. If we let our dreams slip, and put everything else in the world first, then we lose our sparkle and with it our energy diminishes and illness and fatigue can seep in. We all are victims of putting our dreams on hold for others but below are five steps to take today to make the time and room for your dreams; STOP - that's right the first thing I want you to do today is schedule 10 minutes into your diary this week to stop. In this time you are going to find a quiet place to sit and to rest, to dream, to daydream. It may feel selfish but this is always the first step. Don't do anything, just be in the moment. Feel the ground through your feet, look at the colours around you. Notice how your body feels, what you can see, what you can hear, what you can smell, what you can taste, what are the thoughts that pop in your head. REST - Schedule time to rest each day. I'm not talking about sleep, I am talking about stopping for 10 minutes each day to do nothing. Absolutely nothing. Let your mind drift, let your body relax, this is 10 minutes a day to do nothing. We have lost the art of doing nothing yet it's so important for our mind, body, and inner wise to help the three stay connected. ASK - ask for help and guidance. That could be having a chat with your partner to look after the children for 10 minutes so you get time to yourself. It could be chatting with a friend who can hold you accountable, and you agree to do this together. It could be discussing with work some flexibility. It can be asking permission from yourself to have 10 minutes in the morning before everyone else wakes up to sit and do nothing. Or it could be asking for guidance from the universe, affirmation cards, or anywhere that feels comfortable to you. NO - setting boundaries is so important to giving you time. Other people will take and push your boundaries sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally. Start to be more firm and stop cancelling your time for others. TIME - it cannot be bought, time once it has gone is gone forever, so setting a schedule so you know when you will have time for your dreams is really important. Linked with the above actions, it's important to give time for rest, for day dreaming, for planning and for action. However small those steps are, or the time you allocate, each will take you in the direction of your dreams. Take your first step today towards your dreams. Love and light Haulwen

Isn't it funny how careless we often are with our mojo, misplacing it when life throws obstacles at us and then we struggle to find it again. It's just like when we loose the keys down the back of the sofa, we know where they are, we know where they should be, we know what they look like, but for the life of us we just can't find them. So let's think about what you do to perhaps stop losing your keys. Do you have one of those little devices that responds to a whistle? Or one of the new Apple tracking devices you can attach and locate it with your phone (though if you are like me, my keys and phone have usually eloped together). We need to think of tricks we can use to find our mojo quickly and easily, as the longer its missing the more lost we can feel. Follow this 5 step guide to rediscover your mojo; 1) Do a Free on line Personality Type Test - If you're reading this, I am guessing you probably like Personality Type tests. We can often be forever doing what we think we should do, and be who we think we should be, that we can forget who we are. And if we forget who we are, then we can't reconnect with our Mojo. When we do a personality type test its often not telling us something that we don't already know, just reminding us of who we are. Do your favourite one, read through the profile you may already have stored somewhere. Reconnect with strengths and recognise your areas for development. 2) Discover why you lost your mojo - what are the thing in your life that have drained you of your spark, that have caused you to dim your light? As your light dims its hard to find your mojo in the darkness. Do a quick energy audit. Who and what are the energy vampires that are sucking your light out of you? Release them or reduce them in your life. This is a must for your own health, whether that is mind, body or spirit. Now check who/what brings light and warmth into your life? Spend more time doing that. Do a regular checkin each month to ensure you have an energy surplus, as when you have an energy deficit, this is the time when your mojo can get lost. 3) Seek Magic and Wonder every day - perhaps keep a small diary in your pocket, or make notes on your phone, or take photos. Each day be on a mission to find at least one moment of magic and wonder. Slowly increase this until you start seeing magic and wonder everywhere. It can be anything that's magical to you - a rainbow, your favourite coffee from the cafe down the road, laughing with friends, the shape of a cloud, the smell of summer rain. 4) Reconnect with your inner witch - each of us is unique, each of us has our own path that is ours alone. It's time to stop following the crowd and connect with your inner wise, your inner witch. What are the things that make you feel truly you? How can you make your inner witch, more your outer truth? it could be as simple as a hair cut or wearing clothes that you feel more comfortable in. it could be saying no to things that you've always done and saying yes to something that gives you that tingle, that awakens the light within. It could be celebrating the cycles of the moon, and the seasons of the year, in your unique way. Whatever is right for you. 5) Believe in your dreams - we often look for recognition and approval from others. Yet they don't know what is best for you, they don't know what makes you tick. So today consider what you really want in life. Look for the signs, (mine is seeing Jays, Hares or Kingfishers - they remind me I am on the right path), listen to things that inspire you, feel your power. Know you have everything in you to make things work for you, if only you believe in yourself, be happy with what you already have and be forever kind.

Image from Canva Pro - Olivier De Mole - Getty Images The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) ® - is one of the most famous personality type tests and was developed by Katharine Briggs and Isabel Briggs Myers, a mother, and daughter who took the work of the psychologist Carl Jung and developed it into a more user-friendly system we know today. It describes 8 personality preferences and 16 personality type combinations. They developed it to allow people to constructively understand themselves to become better empowered to make decisions about their own lives. The four dimensions of type that were developed are; Extraversion or Introversion - your preference for where you get or focus your energy. Sensing or iNtuition - your preference for the kind of information you gather and trust. Thinking or Feeling - your preference for making decisions Judging or Perceiving - your preference for interacting with the world around you. Now the thing to remember, and what you are taught in Myers Briggs training is that it is a preference, your comfort zone, you can work outside it, and over time you will become balanced, it is not about putting you in a fixed box, but this is your preference of how you operate. And there is no good or bad personality type. I read somewhere recently that "of course there is a bad Myers-Briggs personality type, there has to be as where do murderers, etc come from?" This is where people misunderstand personality types - it doesn't matter if you are an ENTJ or an ISFP you have other facets of your personality than just the ones mentioned in Myers Briggs and someone who commits a murder could be any of these personality types. And all personality types have shadow selves and ways they react under stress, which will differ from one person to another, but all ESTJ's will have a similar stress response, but it is still unique to the individual. I am an INFP - that doesn't mean all INFP's dress the same, read the same books, and listen to the same music. We won't have the same values, but the values we do have we will feel strongly about. And it doesn't mean that all INFP's will like each other. Personality types are there to help you to reconnect with you and remind you of your strengths and your opportunities for development. Used in the correct way they can really help people on their road to self-discovering. Many people have since interpreted the 16-personalities in their own way and there are lots of free resources available for you to read. Personality types can really help you on your journey to reconnect with your inner-wise. To find out more about Myers Briggs go to -https://eu.themyersbriggs.com/en/tools/MBTI or to take a free online quiz of a similar test try 16 Personality types If you have any questions feel free to drop me a line Haulwen Nicholas The Magical Mojo Coach, Myers Briggs Practitioner, NLP Coch, Timeline Therapy TM Practitioner, Hypnotherapy practitioner. The Magical Mojo Coach, author of the book of Personality Tests and founder of the Magical Mojo Academy - Life coaching with a hint of witchery. You can purchase the book at all good book stores. For daily inspiration into email inbox sign up here Follow my Facebook Page @themojocoach Join my free Facebook Group @themojocoachingclub Follow my author Page on Instagram @haulwennicholas Or my NEW daily inspiration page on Instagram @magicalmojowytch www.magicalmojocoach.com

Extroversion versus Introversion An introvert and an extrovert both present at an event for 1,000 people; Before the presentation, they are both nervous - the introvert goes quiet - sits in a corner and goes into their comfort zone, their inner world - the extrovert finds a group of people to talk to and goes to their comfort zone, their external world They both deliver their presentations and are both relieved that they both did well and both got a standing ovation - the introvert feels quietly elated but also tired - they have a quiet drink with a close friend and sneak out to leave early, happy at a good nights work but the high energy in the room makes them weary - the extrovert feels elated, the energy of the room is giving them a high as good as any drugs - they chat and talk to everyone getting more and more energised with the people around them - the extrovert receives a compliment and blushes - the introvert receives a compliment and blushes Extroverts do get nervous, extroverts can be shy - my stepson's girlfriend is an extrovert she gets her energy from the external world but is also painfully shy - her shyness manifests in talking non-stop and quicker and quicker - it’s her natural defense when nervous Introverts can be confident and their need to think before responding properly misinterpret as being shy. Extroverts get their energy from the external world Introverts get their energy from their internal world I wrote the above in the Psychologies Life Leap Club as I'd just read another article where people were getting the difference between extroversion and introversion mixed up. I see and hear this a lot, even within the coaching industry. we have to remember that our preference for extroversion or introversion is; 1) a preference 2) one facet of our personality along with many other personality traits. Jung himself argued that it was rare for someone to conform to a single type and that matters were always complicated by people having other functions (auxiliary functions) and shadow personalities, which aren't always obvious. I often hear people saying that introverts are all empaths. They aren't and extroverts can be empaths too. People mix up introversion and extroversion with other traits so think only extroverts think big picture and introverts the detail - I'm an introvert who is a big picture thinker and extroverts can be detail people. There are assumptions made that introverts don't like to be spontaneous - some do and some don't just like some extroverts are planners and some aren't. As long as we remember that the definition of introversion and extroversion regarding personality types is really about energy then you can make it easier to understand. Those with a preference towards introversion - turn their energy to the internal world and this is where they recharge their batteries. A bit like a robot who goes and plugs themselves in, to recharge in a cupboard. Those with a preference towards extroversion - turn their energy towards the outer world and this is where they recharge their batteries. A bit like a robot who has a solar panel and the more they are outside in the sun, the more energised they feel. Where do you go to recharge your batteries? Love and Light Haulwen x Haulwen Nicholas The Magical Mojo Coach, author of the book of Personality Tests and founder of the Magical Mojo Academy - Life coaching with a hint of witchery. You can purchase the book at all good book stores. For daily inspiration into email inbox sign up here Follow my Facebook Page @themojocoach Join my free Facebook Group @themojocoachingclub Follow my author Page on Instagram @haulwennicholas Or my NEW daily inspiration page on Instagram @magicalmojowytch www.magicalmojocoach.com

A new blog series from Haulwen Nicholas author of The Book of Personality Tests - preferences and comfort zones Hello and welcome, Tell me about your ideal day? The sort of day that makes you feel energised? Is it a day spent with friends, or a day spent reading a book? Think of those days when you feel really comfortable. Where life feels easier? Those are often the days when you are working in harmony with your preferences and yet so few of us really truly know our preferences and truly know our comfort zone. Let's start with preferences - you have a preference for writing with your left or your right hand. But you also know that if you write with your non-preferred hand that it is possible. So if you broke your preferred hand, you know you could learn to write with your non-preferred hand, however, it would take a lot more time and effort to do so. You would feel very tired initially until you had practiced using your non-preferred hand. I am left-handed, but I know should I injure my left hand I could write and do other things with my right hand, and that over time, and with practice, it would get easier to do so. The same applies to personality types we all have a preference for one personality type over another. It doesn't mean we can't do the other preferences, it just means some feel more comfortable. So now let's talk about the comfort zone, it's often discussed in derogatory terms as though being in your comfort zone shows a lack of ambition or impetus - "get out of your comfort zone" and if you Google comfort zone you get headings such as "6 reasons why your comfort zone is holding you back" "7 reasons why getting out of your comfort zone is a must" "how the comfort zone is ruining your life" - although there are some valid points in these articles, we are also living in a time where people are feeling more and more overwhelmed. So perhaps this constant pressure to work away from our comfort zone and our preferences isn't such a good thing after all? When you identify your personality type preferences it helps you to identify where your comfort zone is. This is a good thing. Your comfort zone is where you go to recharge your batteries. If you operate outside it, consistently, as you are encouraged to in the world you live in, then you are going to be exhausted. Understanding your personality type and your preferences helps you to find that comfort zone. How can you get out of a comfort zone if you don't know what is within it and what is outside it? Personality types help you to identify this, and then, when you are ready and you've figured out where you are now and what are your preferences, you can see how you can slowly expand your comfort zone. At your pace, with no pressure from the world around you. So many people I know are suffering burnout and overwhelm, I am one of those people. Determining my personality type helped me to stop and recognise my comfort zone, and with it, helped me to recognise what I need to do to energise myself. Personality types are not about putting people in a box, they are about identifying their preferences, so they can learn where to recharge their batteries and recognise where they have opportunities for growth. There is no wrong or right personality type. And you probably already know what you are, but there is something about taking a quiz and reading words that describe you, that is comforting. And remember, if it doesn't read right to you, then it's because you've answered the questions perhaps when you are operating using your learned preferences. I for years came out as an ENTJ on Myers Briggs ® type testing, but it never felt right, I then trained in it and learned that you should do the best fit analysis too and I am an INFP (3 of my letters different, no wonder I burnt out). Now I embrace who I am, my true nature, and I go there to recharge, I learn new skills and do things that expand my comfort zone, but I also know when to pause on that expansion, stop and recharge. I have the power now to know when to stop. Over this series of blogs, I'll introduce you to some of the personality type tests out there and explain a bit of their history and how you can use them to help you with your life. magical wishes Haulwen Nicholas The Magical Mojo Coach Life Coaching with a hint of witchery My book The Book of Personality Test is available at all good bookstores. Sign up for daily inspiration via email HERE. www.magicalmojocoach.com